Cutting down an advert to 1 minute

I was tasked with cutting down a John Lewis Home Insurance advert down from 1 minute 35 seconds to 1 minute.
To do this I removed part of the living room down and started by cutting to the Hallway scene. To make this flow with the opening of the dad washing the dishes I created an eye-line match of the dad looking at the hallway and then I cut to the camera tracking the girl down the hallway to create an eye-line match.
The after the girl finishes jumping on the sofa I used a graphic match to cut back to a part in an earlier scene in the original advert where she jumps off a footrest. I cut it so as the girl went to land off the sofa it cuts to her landing after jumping off the footrest. This makes the cut seem less obvious and keeps the video flowing.

To make the ending less jarring I put the slogan after the companies logo. this is because the cut between the girl dancing with plant to the shot of glass wobbling with the logo is less jarring and fits better than the scene with the girl taking a bow with the companies slogan of " If it matters to you, it matters to us" as the transition would be more jarring and would ruin the flow of the video.